Sweden is once again in the icy grip of Jack Frost.

Goddamn it and fuck it all to hell, I swear I'll kick this frost-guy 250 years into the future.

'How you like them global warmings, punk?'

I'm not really that upset about the cold itself. It's this whole 'first melting the snow and then freezing everything again leaving exactly every millimetre of Peters otherwise miserable existance entirely encased in slippery' I don't come to terms with. Ice is cool on nipples and in whiskey, enough is enough all right?

Had a conversation with a currently incapacitated friend after a skiing accident in S:t Anton. It went something like this:

'Haha, sorry for not replying earlier, I was in the other room fetching another pillow. No I won't be heading out on saturday... I don't have the strength to be active for an entire day'

'No probs. Yeah I can relate to both taking forever to move to the other room and not being strong enough.'

I was setting her up for setting me up for an unpresedented punch-line. I wanted her to reply something in the lines of 'oh yeah, you were on crutches for 3 months back in 2003' so I could deliver the goods in an exquisite mixture of humbleness and selfdepreciation with this comedic geniality 'No Sara, I'm just fat remember'.

She never took the bait. Apparently I have better script-writers than the rest of the world. Fuck you all.

Yes, I'm a bit on the bitter side today. Really shouldn't be. My sister had her first baby yesterday and Lovisa,the baby, is really pretty, unlike all the other newborn lumps of flesh I've seen. Must have something to do with the genes. Before you all get your g-strings in a twist, she's my step-sister. And yes, my sister's really that pretty.

Another irrelevant study reported in the tabloids showed that Swedish women want more sex. This study is of course tailor-made to generate clicks on the webpage and to sell more of whatever that they're selling. Yeah the study was made by Pfizer. It doesn't take very much of a cynic to connect the dots. I'm over-qualified. I , however, want to make this irrevocably and perfectly clear: 'Swedish women, here I am!' Preferrably you're between 22 and 35 but I'm not picky in either direction. Lame? Yeah, but I'll be the one with all the hotties lining up outside my door.

Tonight I'm heading to bed early.

This is Commander-in-chief, signing out.